Monthly Archives: April 2020

The night I walked away from you, as soon as, you faded from my life; I heard the silence. The silence of my heart which had been broken and pieces thrown away on the floor. I went in dilemma with all the memories of you and I and thinking that we’ll never get a chance to clean up the mess we made. The thought still haunts me.

With all the time passed by without you, I want you to know there are still days I wish I had you to talk to. Days where I want to come rushing to you and tell you all about my day. But, I can’t let what happened before to happen again. I don’t have the strength to come back and fight for you. If we never meet each other again, remember, I love you.

With Love,

A.

I walked away from you,
I burnt the bridge from both sides
So,none of us could go back to each other
Still, each day the ashes reside in my veins and scars still hurt the same.

Everyday, I try to go back to you
But,in the end, I drown
Just drown in the deathly water
The deathly water of memories.
I stay there, trying to relive those memories
Those frozen times where our hearts were never broken,
Where we were enough to comfort each other’s soul.
But,in the end, I realize,
I realize it was all an illusion,
An illusion that seemed true enough to give scars for life
-A.

Hey. I wanted you to know a few things. I am so proud of you. You have suffered every storm till now. I know it may feel so hard to fake a smile, feel as if you can’t take another step. I know it hurts. It hurts deeply because you loved truly but how long are you going to go through it? Why are you punishing yourself?

Things can turn out more than beautiful. Try to live in the moment. You have hurt yourself more than enough. You’re mistreating yourself. You deserve so much more. Start living once again. Some days there won’t be anything to feel good about, you’ll feel everything is ending but it isn’t. Things will get better. You’ll find your happiness and that happiness is worth staying for. Trust me there will be beautiful moments for you. Moments worth staying for. You deserve the universe, don’t let anyone make you think otherwise.

Sending loads of positive energy,

With Love,

A.

Hey. How are you? I missed you. It’s crazy how we always knew each other right and now it’s as if we don’t even know each other. Everytime I think of us, the same unanswered questions haunt me. Why? Why did you leave? What made you leave? I was and still am there for you. I tried to mend things between us. But, I too was exhausted. Exhausted by the you, you had become. I couldn’t make any further efforts. I thought we’ll know each other till the end. Maybe we’ll meet again for the first time. The time when we’ll be wise enough to understand our mistakes. The time when you’ll be too old to remember my face. I’ll remind you of each memory we made, each song we sung together, each story we told people. I’ll remind you “us”

Until then, I wish you all the happiness you deserve.

-A.

// a year of estrangement//

its been a year since you’ve gone

the summers had the chaos.

but i loved the peace while i was caged inside your arms.

the autumn came: the fall season.

the leaves fell and so did i.

i fell apart thinking of you.

the winters came.

they were dry.

they weren’t as comforting as they were with you.

now, it’s spring all over again.

i still wish you could come right back to me.

if not,

remember,

i love you.

-A.

Dear Future Lover,

Hey. We might be a thousand miles away right now but I believe in magic. The magic that would bring us together.

Honestly, I am not perfect. Rather, I’m flawed and am a shitty person. I make mistakes. But I promise, I would be the best version of me for you.

When you arrive to my heart, I will say “Hey. Welcome. Make yourself comfortable.” I would want to know of your past to know how you want to be loved. I’ll listen to your endless tales and learn how to love you.

I will tell you you’re beautiful when you’re all dressed up. I will tell you you’re beautiful when you’re all messy and exhausted by a long day. Because I believe. I believe you’re beautiful.

When you’ve a bad day, when you would “act differently”; I won’t blame you for anything. I’ll rather sit by your side and ask “what made you feel that way?”

I’ll write you letters and expect the same in return because I love the old school romance.

I will write you poems and poems on you that you’ll never know are for you.

When you leave; i will say “Thank you for visiting. I love you.” Your letters would always remain in my journal and our memories in my heart.

-A.